LAW 1: MODELING
“Children COPY us either positively or negatively.”
“And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. 6 And these words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart; 7and you shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up.”
Deuteronomy 6:5-7 – 5
LAW 2: RELATIONSHIP
“The CLOSER the relationship, the greater the influence.”
“Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company corrupts good morals.’”
1 Corinthians 15:33
LAW 3: TIME
“The more TIME spent with a person, the greater the influence.”
These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. 7 Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.
Deut. 6:6-8
Time with our children is INVESTED time, never WASTED time.
We need to INTENTIONALLY PLAN time with our children. We also need to seize opportunities to be with them. If needed, create the opportunities yourself!
LAW 4: LISTENING
“The more we LISTEN the greater we understand and consequently influence them.”
This you know, my beloved brethren. But let everyone be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger; for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God.
James 1:19-20
HOW TO LISTEN
- Interact – Don’t REACT
- Resist the impulse to LECTURE
- Give them your full ATTENTION
- Draw them out with QUESTIONS
- Listen to their FEELINGS
- Listen to UNDERSTAND
- Listen first before TALKING
- Listen without getting ANGRY
LAW 5: POSITIVE WORDS
“Words IMPACT others’ lives”
“Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.
Proverbs 18:21
“Fathers, do not exasperate your children, that they may not lose heart.”
Colossians 3:21
“Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, that it may give grace to those who hear.
Ephesians 4:29
LAW 6: LOVE
“Unconditional LOVE influences towards positive change.”
But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.
Romans 5:8
LAW 7: EXPECTATION
“Expect the BEST from them. Our expectations influence our children’s behavior.”
For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.
Philippians 1:6
A child arrived just the other day,
Came to the world the usual way
But there were planes to catch and bills to pay,
He learned to walk when I was away.
He was talking before I knew it and as he grew he said,
“I’m going to be just like you dad, you know I’m going to be just like you!”
“When are you coming home dad?”
“I don’t know when.
We’ll get together then.
You know we’ll have a good time then.”
My son turned 10 just the other day
Said, “Thanks for the ball!
Now c’mon let’s play. Will you teach me how to throw?
I said, “Not today son,
I’ve got a lot to do.”
He said, “That’s OK.” and he walked away and smiled.
Then he said, “I’m going to be just like you dad, you know I’m going to be just like you!”
“When are you coming home dad?”“I don’t know when. We’ll get together then.
You know we’ll have a good time then.”
He came from college just the other day, so much like a man I just had to say,
“I’m proud of you! Won’t you sit for a while?”
He shook his head and said with a smile, “What I’m feeling like, Dad, is to borrow the car keys.
See you later, can I have them please?
“I’m going to be just like you dad, you know I’m going to be just like you!”
I’ve long since retired and my son’s moved away.
Called him up just the other day.
“I’d like to see you son if you don’t mind.
He said, “I’d love to Dad, If I could find time.
You see my new job’s a hassle
And the kids have the flu.
But it’s sure nice talking to you, Dad.
It’s been real nice talking to you.
As I hung up the phone it occurred to me
My son’s grown up just like me.
My boy was just like me.
